Professionals v/s Non-professionals

A brief throwaway comment by a friend sent the CC into a reverie about the distinction between the two. The CC was talking about a gazpacho (forthcoming entry) and the CC was explaining the pains it took to get there.

It was pointed out to the CC that commercial kitchens couldn't possibly do that.

Well, they can, and they can't.

If they charge enough, they can. If not, they can't.

Commercial kitchens also have all these little Jamies running around all thinking they are going to be the next celebrity chef but they're just all earning a pittance, and truly a pittance it is.

No home chef can possibly have the luxury of the help, and symmetrically, no commercial kitchen has the luxury of detail.

The CC would love to have industrial-strength stoves ("BTU's, baby!!!") and an army of little minions but reality is neither going to be forthcoming nor obliging.

On the other hand, no commercial kitchen can afford to take the kind of care and detail that even an average home cook lavishes on their meals. They are ultimately a commercial enterprise, and have to get a return on their investment.

So why does their food "appear" better? They do have an army of minions, and they do have an army of tricks but they may or may not have the wealth of detail (not unless you pay steeply for it, and even then it's a bit of an illusion.)

So what's the CC's point?

The two enterprises are truly different, and it seldom behooves anyone to compare them.

Kitchen Instruments (The List)

Promised before the CC went on vacation, here are:

"The Indefensibles"

Prep work

French chef's knife
trimmer
kitchen peeler
mortar & pestle
kitchen scissors

Pots & pans

stock pot
any ol' pot
skillet

Miscellaneous

coffee grinder
food mill
food processor
blender
measuring cup

Pre-serving instruments

cheese grater

Everything else is icing on the cake; there are tons of items that would be "useful" but they are not "necessary".

Dips, Raitas, and other assorted goodies

Virtually every country that consumes milk has some variations on this theme.

The CC had a lot of leftover yogurt (don't ask!), and some assorted stuff (cucumbers, carrots, mint, curry leaves) in his refrigerator. His thoughts turned to how to consume most of it efficiently, but also leave it in a form that could be easily stored for later consumption.

Inspiration struck, and out came the thought of making a bunch of yogurt-based foods.

There are more recipes here than humans. Writing a book on these would be the ultimate waste of time. Who'd read all these basic variations on the same theme?

Tzatziki

Ingredients

1 english cucumber (grated)
2 cloves garlic (minced fine)
mint (chopped into ribbons)
strained yogurt
salt and pepper

Recipe

Mix everything, and let it sit for an hour.

South-Indian Carrot Raita

Ingredients

carrots (grated)
1 tsp mustard seeds
1 tbsp urad
5-7 curry leaves
strained yogurt
salt

Recipe

Heat a tiny amount of oil in a pan. Toss in the mustard seeds. When they splutter, toss in the urad. When they turn light brown, toss in the curry leaves. Add the carrots and sautee for about a minute. Let it cool.

Mix everything together, and let it sit for at least an hour.

HaT3rZ!!!

There's always going to be things you hate.

You can't like everything, and if as they say, you are what you like, then you are just as much as what you hate.

Or as Goethe put it more poetically, "I hate everything Egyptian."

Please note that these are not things that you dislike. These are things that you hate. The difference lies in the intensity of the feeling.

So here are the list of the CC's hates:

Fast-food restaurants

"Kill me! Kill me now."

Rice pudding (and variants)

Vile texture. Utter failure as rice; utter failure as dessert.

Most Indian sweets

Too sweet. Failure at a balance in taste. Why not just eat sugar?

Soft-boiled eggs

Too yolk-y early in the morning. Worse after a bender. Would like to like them but can't.

Brownie-Coffee combo

Bad enough being "wired". This is like being "wired", and wanting to throw up. Can't imagine how bad it'd be after a bender. Wouldn't care to try.

The CC is sure there are more but this will do for a start.

Audience participation welcomed!

Dated-ness

Well, recently the CC has been making some of the older recipes on this blog (pure coincidence) and he notices that the recipes are kinda dated.

It's not really dated in the traditional sense ("ooooh! that is soooo 1997".)

While the ingredients are exactly what they should be, the description of the execution is not quite what the CC does in reality. He takes extra steps, or even skips some which he realizes are not that important. It's really a deepening of technique not a dating of the blog.

For the record, the two most important things the CC seems to have learnt in the last five years is how to "fry vegetables" (look for an upcoming post), in regards to all kinds of dishes; and the importance of texture in a dish. Controlling texture is very very important even for something that is eaten daily (a little harder to post about.)

Saffron Roasted Potatoes

The CC never thought that anything could give properly made french fries a run for their money.

If you find new potatoes, by all means use them!

Ingredients

new potatoes halved, or roasting potatoes cut into large cubes
tomatoes
saffron
salt & pepper

Recipe

First you need to dunk the tomatoes in boiling water, and pass them through a food mill to collect the pulp.

Heat some olive oil, and when hot, toss in the tomato pulp. Add salt, and lots of pepper. Let it reduce at a very low heat for at least 30-35 mins. If it thickens too much, you can always add water later.

Towards the end, toss is two large pinches of saffron, stir it, and take it off the heat.

Lay the potatoes in a baking sheet, pour the liquid all over it, and bake at 400°F for 30-40 minutes until the potatoes are lightly browned.

Roasted Brussel Sprouts with Walnuts

Well, the CC was never fond of brussel sprouts until he actually figured out how to make them well.

Well, the chief problem with cooking anything of the brassica family is that overcooking will make it smell bad, taste like nothing, and flabby to boot.

No taste; bad smell; no texture. How much worse can it get?

Moral? Don't overcook.

There's a simple way to handle it. Boil some water, and when it has come to a boil, dunk them, and cook for no more than 3 mins. Cool; cut each in half; then roast them.

Verdict? Very gobblicious.

Ingredients

1 lb brussel sprouts
balsamic vinegar (we used a fig vinegar)
walnuts (coarsely broken/chopped)
salt and pepper

Recipe

Boil the brussel sprouts as above. Cut them in half.

Lay them in a baking pan. Sprinkle with olive oil, salt and pepper. (Alternately, you can mix them with the above in a bowl, and then lay them out.)

Sprinkle with balsamic vinegar, and chopped walnuts.

Roast at 425°F for about 20 mins. Check if they have caramelized. If not, roast for another 5 mins or so.

Blistered Shishito Peppers

This is one of those concepts that almost every culture has a version of.

The idea is to serve blistered peppers, lightly pan-fried, and sprinkled with coarse sea salt. If you have very mild peppers, you don't need to control the heat. Otherwise you need to slit it, and scoop away part of the inside to control it.

Naturally, in some masochistic cultures (there's one in India), they amp up the heat by using the hottest peppers, but we need not go there.

The CC encountered some lovely shishito peppers (quite mild, with a modest heat) at the farmers market. You can also use cubanelles, or even bell peppers (provided you peel them first.)

This is one of those "Greedy Gus" recipes. No matter how much the CC makes, there's never any left so plan accordingly.


Ingredients

shishito peppers (count at least 7-8 per guest)
olive oil
coarse sea salt.

Recipe

First, you need to individually roast the peppers over an open gas flame till they are blistered and charred in spots (This is the point of the recipe at which you can store them for a few hours. Just put a paper napkin to absorb the moisture so that they don't get soggy.)

Just before you serve, sautee them in a little olive oil.

Serve them hot in a serving dish, and sprinkle coarse sea salt quite generously all over them.

Your guests will gobble them up!

Popcorn

Well, you may or may not have been reading about the ridiculous "microwave popcorn", and the chemical diacetyl causing cancer, etc, whoop-dee-doodle-doo, blahtee-bloody-blah.

Popcorn making is trivial. In fact, the CC is a big fan so he makes it often, and no funny chemicals need apply.

Let not these complete fools dissuade you. Follow these instructions, and you will have glorious golden popcorn every single time (unless you use red or blue corn.)

Ingredients

popcorn kernels
olive oil (or any vegetable oil)
salt

Recipe

First, note the ingredient list. Do you see anything funny?

No? Then the "microwave popcorn"-people are just nebbishes and clueless retards.

Pour a smallish amount of oil into a pot, something sturdy. Turn the heat to medium-low, definitely less than medium high, and toss in three to four corn kernels, and cover the pan (you need a sturdy cover too.)

Wait for the first pop or two. (this is the "hard" part.)

When they do, and the CC assures you, they will eventually, open the pan, toss in the salt, and the rest of the kernels, cover the pan again, lift the pan with gloves, shake horizontally vigorously (to cover the kernels in the oil and salt), put them back on the stove, and wait.

Wait. Wait. Wait.

Do not turn the heat up. Just wait.

When they "finish" popping, pour them into a bowl, and enjoy. You may need to add extra salt or seasoning to taste.

Shiso

English name is Perilla, or Beefsteak Plant but the CC almost always sees it referred to by the Japanese name.

You may have eaten it with your sushi most likely as ikashiso (ika = squid; shiso = shiso.)

It has a very minty taste, and a certain sharpness that takes some getting used to.

Storing Food

The CC doesn't want to turn this into one of those self-help columns, you know, Fourteen Fast Foods, Nine Nightly Noshes, or even Help for Hapless Harried Housewives but feels a bit compelled to write this after having several conversations with supposedly intelligent people.

The CC is a firm believer in causality: you know, A causes B which causes C, etc. There isn't no magic but umami, and we are but its humble servants.

It all started one day, a long time ago, when the CC was packing something into a plastic bag, and squeezing out the air before he sealed the ziplock.

A friend asked why the CC was doing that, and the CC said, it'll increase the chances of the food not going bad (or equivalently, the food will not rot as fast.)

Firstly, scorn was heaped upon the CC for believing "old wives' tales", etc. while the CC just stood there with his characteristic supercilious save-me-from-this-village-idiot grin.

Some of you are likely to have experienced this grin yourself.

The CC asked the friend, "So why does food rot?"

The answer which the highly-intelligent, over-educated scientist did manage to come up with was "Because there are fungus and bacteria which attack the food."

The CC then asked, "So where are these fungus and bacteria?"

There was a nonplussed silence.

The CC was relentless, "So where are they?"

The CC invoked the sacred Socratic silence, tapped his foot, and waited impatiently for realization to strike.

It did strike as it always does, "All around us."

After that, the coup de grâce was delivered, "So if they are all around us, then it stands to reason that their numbers are proportional to the volume of air, and hence if you squeeze out the air, you're increasing the chances of your food not going bad."

This is not like coming up with a quantum theory of gravity, you know!

Anyway, now that he's gotten that off his chest, the CC will make a segue to talking about storing food.

The CC is a realist, and realizes that the need for fabulous food must be balanced with other concerns of modern society like making money to pay for the food, etc. And anything that can promote the cause of fabulous food is then a victory.

So how does one increase the chances of vegetables in the refrigerator?

As we have clearly noted, the process of rotting isn't magic. All vegetables are covered in gook when you buy them so wash them. Next, dry them completely. Wrap them in paper towels, and put them in open bags, and put them in the vegetable crisper. (The paper towels absorb the moisture that they give off; and you will need to change the towels every few days.)

The CC assures you that this works, and you will prolong the life of your vegetables by a few days.

And, never ever put tomatoes in the fridge. They lose their smell, and tomatoes that don't have an aroma are good for only one thing. Tossing in the garbage.

There is also no need to refrigerate onions, shallots, garlic, etc. This should be obvious.

Freezing also works but it also totally destroys the texture. The ice shards formed from the water content penetrates the walls of the cellular structure totally turning them into mush.

Happy vegetable eating. That's all, folks!

The "Right" Restaurants

Well, the CC hied himself to one of his favorite restaurants in the Bay Area, a hole-in-the-wall. We've already heard about this in an earlier entry.

The owner (who's also the server) has the right attitude to food. When he goes on vacation, the place shuts down. If he thinks something is better, he tells you that you should change your order (which brings the CC to question why the original item is on the order but let's not get too analytical about these things.)

The absence of a certain I-wont-eat-pork-or-chicken-ista provided the rare indulgence of a feast of flesh. We had catfish (amok), beef, and catfish topped with shredded chicken.

The CC was told in no uncertain terms that he should upgrade to a different catfish dish from the one he ordered, and the CC did so unhesitatingly. Only the need to look dignified stopped the CC from licking the plate clean of the wondrous lemongrass sauce.